I’m convinced that Sriracha is the official condiment of hipsters everywhere. It’s about as ubiquitous as anything with a mustache on it nowadays. “Rooster Sauce” is getting a shout out on Orange is the New Black. The ‘stache thing has gone as far as multicolor mustache WINE CHARMS being sold in Home Goods. They’re both all over the place. I digress. After a month away from home, yesterday I had some serious grocery shopping to do. This clearly translated in my head to a guilt-free bonanza at Whole Foods.

Juli over at PaleOMG has been using a lot of Sir Kensington’s condiments lately, so I took a gander just to see if the local WF carried their products. Lo and behold, this gem was sitting on the shelf next to his unflavored brethren.

Sriracha mayo! This was a jump into the deep end for me, because I have never been one to eat Hellman’s as an adult or a child, unless my Mom made tuna salad on Saturdays for lunch. Tuna sandwiches with a side of potato chips. It was our thing.

Anyhow, I must admit I actually haven’t bought a bottle of sriracha sauce on its own, but this seemed as good of an opportunity as any to hop on the bandwagon. After a sample run on some Applegate Farms all-beef hot dogs, my taste buds were happy. The wheels in my head began to turn pondering how I can eat MOAR of this in a quasi-nutritious and socially acceptable manner. (Read: Don’t be eating condiments with a spoon. That’s bad. Unless it’s fresh guac. In that case, dig in.)

I shouldn’t have to say it, but I will anyway: this recipe is so easy you’ll fall out of your chair. BONUS: it features a side of audience participation and eyeballing your own ingredients! Yeehaw! (Can you tell I just spent 3 weeks in Texas?)

Sriracha Chicken Salad

• Cooked Chicken Breast (summer = mine was prepared on the grill)
• Sir Kensington’s Sriracha Mayo
• White Onion, chopped
• Green Pepper, chopped
• Celery, chopped
• Chipotle flakes
• Salt & Pepper

1) Cook however much chicken as you want to turn into salad.

2) Chop vegetables.

3) Shred your chicken.

NOTE: If you’ve got a food processor with a slicing attachment, NOW is the time to use it! I’ve read that the mixing blade will just give you chicken paste. Nobody wants that. My slicing blade rendered 4 pieces of chicken into perfect shreds in about 22 seconds flat.

4) In a bowl, combine all ingredients with enough mayo to cover the meat & veggies. Nobody wants to be taking a swim.

5) Season with S&P and chipotle flakes to taste.

Now how hard was that?